It has been way too many years since I’ve been able to write. It seems every time I sit down in front of my computer or with a pen and paper in my lap, all thought process vanishes. But in starting this blog I have noticed little glimpses of “light” shining through holes in that writer’s block. I’ve been working on my novella again. I never would have thought that a paper I wrote in the 10th grade (which only took me 2 hours to write) would ever even hint at turning into something more. The base of the story is there. (It spawned from a creative writing assignment that had to be 5 pages, double spaced, and be purely fictional) Now in looking over the opening of this potentially novel sized story, I see hope. So much of what I love is already outlined for me. So why is it so hard to continue the story? Most of the 5 pages I wrote (about 12 years ago) need to be re-written, or at least re-organized.
So…..that’s where I must start. I’m also hung up on the main character name. She’s a pixie. A very, very, magical and ‘special’ pixie. Originally, I had named her after a friend of mine, Pia. But, depending on what age group I intend for this story to be for I figure, Pia (pee-ah) might get a few giggles out of the younger generations. And the freedom that comes with fantasy writing is being able to go to a sort of ‘extreme’. Do I really want to limit the vocabulary and almost ‘dumb-down’ my writing? Or the potential of my writing rather. These are the questions I’m getting hung up. And I know this is just my writer’s block at its best. Or quite possibly my worst critic….me. I know that I sometimes get in the way of myself. Even when I try my hardest to break through those walls and barriers. I try to remind myself that there was a time where I was a talented author. I remind myself that there was in fact a time when I had many mentors who believed in my talents. And now its a matter of re-believing in myself and pushing through those self-limiting beliefs that are so easy to fall back on. It’s time for me to conquer those fears and take on the world.